Wow..
still feel like in a daze from yesterday's cg until now...
cant believe what happened actually happened..
i mean, the memories are there, but i just cannot register in my head and in my heart Just WHAT happened...

Beeleng was preaching a message on guilt. was crying throughout the whole time she preached, and jonathan and kokseng were like.. not very ok like that.. jonothan sat in a corner when beeleng asked us to be prayed for.. den...wa.. JONATHAN AND KOKSENG MANIFESTED AND GOT DELIEVERED!

O.O

shock man. walao.. i was so dam scared...i felt my sprit stirring in me.. my heart was beating v. fast.. and.. i was with shanika, hugging her, and she hugging me.. we were really scared..den..i mean, i was already crying, then shanika cried too.. she cried and cried.. den..she FAINTED! O.O

1st time i see some1 faint leh! she was like, next to me!!!! O.O O.O''''

SCARED LAH!!!
wa...
she said that she was scared, that because her house like not clean den dey manifest.. thats what she thought.. i dont think she knows the concept of delieverence then la, anyway, she said that lately, she hasnt been sleeping well, and sees things in her house.

beeleng and wendy put oil on her face, like under her nose and below her eyes.it was like.. WAHHH..
den her amah come home and start scolding her ...it was v. awkward..

den.. well.. we went downstairs 1st, the whole cg... din wan cause more trouble for her and
her amah..

den we went sit at coffee shop, me beeleng jonathan adrian wendy xin yi...the rest went to play basketball.. just sit down there drink drink... den... later we walked to the bball court, and shanika come down liao.. she seemed to be ok, just tired.. den..wa... things seemed to be ok, and.. so we went home.. i followed beeleng to the mrt, because bl had wedding dinner... got lost on the way. T___T'
haa...

anyway, i was with my friend, when huishan called me and said shanika like gonna faint liao, shanika said that she saw something at the tree there, some little boy... as in, she saw something that in the natural was non-existent. aka, most likely sprit..she fainted 3 times when i wasnt there..

den huishan call me to come down. so i told my fren go home 1st...haiyoh, still feel v. bad abt tat.. den went down. wah, shanika looked so dead, when i saw her again.. oh man.. im really stupid, shouldnt have left in the 1st place... haiz... she.. face pale pale... don wan eat, don wan drink... oh God..my sprit started really burdening me then... heart felt v. heavy..

den we -me and shan- tried to talk some sense into shanika, and ask her to stay at 1 of our houses for the night, because thing is, she Cannot stay alone, wait she faint again den no1 know..so we decided that i will go stay at her house, watch over her, anything i'll call huishan and vivian.. so we walked to her house. den, at her house, i called my ma. asked for permission, assumed can lah, because most of the time i dont have a problem with staying over... but my ma.. she scolded me.. she said its not safe for me to be there, and so... well, sucky feeling lah.. walao, i cried again.. haiz.. haiz,.. i guess she like that.. because my pa nt in singapore.. den.. aiya.. now only i understand, that she oso will worry for me,cuz she nvr see shanika before, and my hp no batt.. anything happen i oso cannot call back.. ..but at that time i was really pissed off at her, for not letting me do something i should be doing...
i felt really useless.. haiz... i was really really willing to do that, to care for her
its jing gai de..
and.. i couldnt even do that for shanika...
haiz.. my ma didnt let me to stay alone with another person in the hse.. she said if minimum 3 ppl can... haiz.. den after that, vivian called, and den her auntie allow us-shanika and me- to go her house stay. i felt v. bad, because shanika had to go some1 elses house to stay... but at least i could make sure things were ok.. otherwise wo really bu hui fang xin...

so that was our final plan. my ma allowed, because, ya lah, vivian house got so many ppl... den.. yea! we walked there. but then, when we were downstairs vivian's block, at the walkway, Shanika fainted again! that was the 1st time she standing den just fall.. walao! xia si ren leh!!! O.O'' but, it attracted a crowd.. dey called an ambulance... meanwhile, i was holding shanika.. a passerby came and tried to get her to wake up... her mother came, the ambulance came, her stepfather came... dey took her to sgh... so me and vivian cabbed down there, the ane..

wah.. my heart really thumping v. fast.... T__T''
shanika was in the room, i think being checked up... see what was wrong... the situation was really tense... her parents were constantly telling us, no nid to scared de, "wo xiang xin zhe ge ye shu hui bao hu ta de" uncle sent vivian back home 1st, because she got curfew, i think.. i stayed behind... was scared, not only for shanika, but oso because my phone had no batt, and die liao, den i was afraid of the big big hantaming i'd get when i went home... anyway, used a pay phone to call beeleng, who was on the way... and.. lucky lah, because beeleng came just before shanika was about to get transferred to kk hospital for observation..

the doctor said that physically, she was ok.. dey tot it was emotional problems, because that they wont know... it was spritual attack i tot.. haiz.. i never knew satan was so strong... the worry was always there, in my heart, that if satan can cause this much trouble, whos to say he wont do more than this. was praying in uncle's car... oh ya, uncle sent me and beeleng to kk hospital, because aunty took with the ambulance.. all along the way, in his car, wit beeleng, uncle was talking about God, and how he touched his life. he talked in chinese de, so i din understand everything... but anyway, despite the situation, i couldnt help but smile.. after what happened...because, he said, "if this God cannot let us see him, he can still let us feel him, and i think he is a really really good god.." i felt his heart was really pure, towards God, and that he loved God alot... wanted to seek God like that.. haha.. i could help but smile! God touches ppl in strange ways...but really, he did not change the topic at all, even the conversation in the hospital was about God.. only when dey started discussing shanika's situation den the conversation stopped.

anyway, in kk, me and beeleng saw shanika... she looked so helpless....we were so worried...Guys, Gers, lets pray for her, k? pray that she will not see anything that she should not see again.. pray that she will be safe, the Blood of God can come and purify her, it can wash away the past hurts.. pray her sprit is strengthened.. pray she will be fine...lets go visit her too! :) dey will keep her under observation for a day, i think.. and after that i think dey will ask her to go see a psychiatrist.. because physically the tests showed she was ok.. so..yea.. only thing, is she din eat for te whole day...

oh man... yesterday.. feels so tense... haiz.. i had to leave at 1, because my ma called beeleng's phone, and i kena scolding..again..she said that if i wasnt home before 2, she wld make police report.. dat really scared me.. din wanna cause any1 more problems than there were already....haiz.. i wish my damn battery didnt die lah, den maybe i could have stayed longer, could have talked to her.. i din really say much... i din really do much.. i feel so damn useless ... haiz.. ... ... ...

anyway, yes, the last time i saw her.. was 12:50+ den.. she looked really tired.. her eyes were red..i saw the injection on her and.. taped down there.. wa.. felt really scared... i hate seeing or getting injections... den.. wa.. she really looked so helpless!!! T___T''' should have prayed for her... i guess things of the sprit can only be solved by the Holy sprit... anyway, i hope she slept well... i hope she finally has rest, has peace from the nights she cant sleep.. i pray the lamb of peace really does come upon her right now.. and cleanses her through out.. i pray her sprit will be lifted, and she will feel the love of God.. oh shanika oh shanika..there are ppl who care for you... we really love you.. please take care of yourself? we dont want so see you get hurt like this... its really dam jialat.. oh Shanika.....oh God...

...
yea...
anyway, at 1.05, beeleng.. lent me 30$ to cab home.. i feel.. really useless man.. im wasting ppl's time and money.. haiz.. oh well.. i'll return her tmr.. the cab fare was $10.50.. tomorrow.. thats today... yea. i don care, im gonna pon drum lesson. heck care the damn teacher, talk crap put on puppydog eye or whatever.. i'll do everything i can to get out of going every sunday for lesson. hate it. hate missing services...haiz... oh well.. God oh God.. yesterday... when i offed the light.. i felt.. suddenly very scared.. felt i dont know.. i initially intended to just sleep and forget everything, because my sprit really felt very very burdened.. shou bu liao...

then.. when the light was off.. i felt scared...so worshipped God and prayed for awhile.. den wanna sleep, so i played christian music throughout the whole time.. i was sleeping.. den woke up at about 5 or 6 i think.. den went back to sleep.. so not really a good rest.. i hope every1 elses' was ok... haiz.. oh ya, funni lar, in my christian songs playlist, there is this song, forsaken, bu a band called skillet. it was like.. hardcore, and.. the guitar riffs and heavy drums... the.. ok, growls..it was really scary lah.. haha.. IMAGINE LAH! wanna sleep that time suddenly RAWR RAWR RAWRWWRWRWRR GRRRHhh.... aiyoh... was so scared...

today i woke up, not feeling too good.. not feeling too well, feel better than yesterday though... i hope shanika is ok, really.. imagine how jialat, it is to be in hospital, nothing to do, ppl you dont know... and.. wah, she saw 1 horror movie that took place in a hospital recently.. and.. well.. haiz.. i just hope shes ok lah. God, protect her. in Jesus' name, every demon that is near her, father i ask you to wash them away with you blood, and father oh father, wash her clean.. let her never see things she should be seeing ever again.. father strengthen her, father help her.. in Jesus name.. amen.