mu546 10am. departure
.........thats alvina's flight's name...
going china? 3 weeks? ....
haiz.....
so many things going through my mind nw.

...
alvina.
we will miss you, alright?
.....
.....
.....
wherever you are.. wherever you may be... we love you. we'll pray for you, we'll... oh man... we'll miss you. take care.

.......
alvina...

haiz...
3 WEEKS LEH!!!! ....
...

ok lah. i cant type out exactly what im feeling now. because its not a good thing. and.. yeah! ...
haiz..

anyway..
today.. was like.. dead ..
7am - eliz goh waked me up to pass her sch pe shirt
4pm - leave house go mrt?! meet fren
6.45pm - meet isma and valerie, eat dinner wit dem
7.45pm - rushing to get to henderson industrial park, z2h music theory lesson...
9pm - lesson ends. it was extended 30 mins. because it started 20 mins late.
9.40pm - meet fren again at queenstown
11.40pm - reach home.
blah.

this was my stupid day.
it really is really... slow! ....
usually there are alot more things i have to rush for
like tuition or.. last time, karate.. or.. now, z2h lessons.. or.. hmn.. GETTING TO SCH ON TIME! ...
bleah...
come to think of that, im really scared, that.. well... my results are getting back tomorrow. im really scared... i know, i must have faith, and believe, and thank God no matter what! .. but... im really scared..... GOD.... youre thoughts are higher than my thoughts.. your ways are higher than my ways.. everything about you is higher than everything about me.. im your servant.. do to me as you will... but... even a servant at the table can take from the crumbs of the bread the father gives to the children...

the bible tells us not to worry... i wont worry!...
but... i feel so .. GOD...

....
i feel so .. useless.. this is the 1st time ive felt like this in a really long time..so.. yes! ... im miserable! ... and i think that the reason why.. is really dumb.. so dumb.. that i wont bother blogging it. i cant do anything right, man... shit lah..... oh well. my wrong. my mistakes. my Error. my Troubles, My Life.
..
thank God that God exists.
...
haiz.
i really do feel like shit now..
whats wrong with me.
...
thinking back,
God spoke to me this revalation, that im NOT too young to do things i want to do. i cant just sit here and wait for perfect conditions, ACT NOW. i have to move out of my confort zone.

...
but its so hard..
i tried. honestly, i tried. but thing is, i only gave it 15%. i didnt go all out to do the 100%. and now its too late. because if i start doing the 100%, for one thing, its already too late to ask. i have 6hours and 15 mins more, to get there. is that enough? ... doubt it. Highly doubt it.

i dont even think i can be there. i dont even think i can wake up! ..
what kind of shit friend am i man... haiz...
oh man...
im so scared about this.....
haiz!!!!! ....
kanasai.
...
....
oh well.
i have no mood to post on what i intended to say just now anyway.
so what the hell?
and heck.
kanasai!
:D
so happy!
i kanaed sai!
it drop on me and my life is like SHIT!
....

NEW TOPIC:

GOD.
whatever happens.
youre my God,
and
i trust you for my results.
let your will be done.
please make me
everything you want me to be
i am yours.
your property,
and you cleansed me with your life, your blood
along side with every other person.
and.. God, please help me through this. i dont know what willl happen, honestly, and im really afraid of it. GOD. help me.. please...
in jesus name..
i pray this prayer.
it will be answered.
because God has a firewire cable,
and all the Broadband in the world is his. and he is reading this post, this prayer,
on his 150, 200 inch screen.
and..
God.
please. you did a miracle already. you did something i totally did not expect.
i pray for this to be another miracle.
God.
i have faith.
I WILL BE IN EXPRESS.
I DONT CARE HOW MANY PEOPLE WILL PUT ME DOWN,
HOW MUCH MOCKERY AND HOW MUCH PEOPLE WILL LAUGH AT ME.
I WILL DO MY BEST.
I WILL NOT GIVE UP
I WILL FIGHT THE GOOD FIGHT AND FINISH STRONG.
GOD.
i am
yours.
your child.
and,
"so if you sinful people know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly father give good gifts to those who ask him" matthew 7:11
and, one of the most basic verses...
"Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Kep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you. for everyone who asks, receives. everyone who seeks finds. and to everyone who knocks, the door will be opened."matthew 7:7-8

God, i ask for this. i ask to be put into express next year. i ask for a Good class, a Good future!
God. so many things i want to ask for.
God, i ask for alvina's safety. i ask for her complete, and total protection.
God, i ask for wendy's safety. i ask that she stays safe, wherever she goes in m'sia.
God, i ask for blessings to come upon w387. i ask that they will be blessed financially, physically, and in Whatever ways that are possible!
God.
youre a Good god.
youre our father.
our abba father.
i trust in you
youre the Only person i can trust with a hundred percent.
and,
GOD,
Thank You. I Know that i will go into express, I Know that all the things i asked for will come to pass.
BY FAITH.
I CLAIM THIS.
I WILL GET INTO EXPRESS.
ALVINA AND WENDY WILL BE SAFE, OVERSEAS.
W387 WILL BE BLESSED
God.
you know me, inside and out. you know i dont like to pray, so i blog my prayers.
you alone know why.
and i want it to stay that way.
in jesus name, i pray.
Amen.