helloz
im feeling really down today
idk y, because i was fasting today -.-
hahaha
that is really IRONIC.
wow.

haiz...

i really need some1 who will listen to me pour out all the troubles that are circling around in my heart... but who will be so good, to actually listen, and not scold me for what i think... until i finish... who is so good... who can understand what i feel? ... even the closest friends i have will not be there for me forever... that is sad, but its reality... people move on... and i'll just get left there, left behind, again... i wish that i can relive my life... i've made so many mistakes... trusting people was one of them... hahas.... i didnt expect it to hurt so much... i thought i've gotten over it... and now something totally new is coming into the picture and making it all blurry... haiz... and STILL, im trying to get twin and hilda to come church.... i feel like such a hypocrite... Matthew 7:5 "Hypocrite! First get rid of the log in your own eye; then you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend's eye." well... maybe i dont know how to get rid of the log... who will help me? NOBODY will!.. i'll just be left there to bleed, as usual. crying out, searching, but he will find the door locked, and i lost the key... i try to hack it down, but still, it stands, stubborn as usual. he will not use his might and strength to knock it down. y? because he gave us free will. and, free will dosent work this time.. i need some1's help... but in reality... who will ?